romance – Page 6 – Sage Sips / TaoCraft Tarot

Romance Tarot Reading with Magician and The Lovers Cards

A popular 2011 post from the Modern Oracle / Tarotbytes blog archives

Q: I met a man who seemed to be all anyone could want…a little older, financially stable, professional, interested in me. But he could be pushy, too, and he pushed me to go on a vacation together, his treat. Turns out he is a horrible gambler. The whole trip was a disaster…shocking. I keep attracting men like this, and after this experience I wonder if I will ever have a good relationship. I had a career reading with you last year, and liked the way you look at things. Can you give any insight to the romance side of things?

A: I think you are right…this experience was shocking, but it got your attention. It helped you see a pattern, and to realize you want something different. As traumatizing as it was in the short term…in the big picture this may actually be a valuable experience.

There are two tarot cards that are exquisitely applicable to your situation: The Lovers and The Magician.

They are both major arcana cards…which speaks to the power and importance of the things your are thinking about.

The Lovers symbolizes desire, and The Magician represents transformation and manifestation.

Your experience with this man, and the way it felt inevitable, shows it is an important and powerful lesson: it shows you that what is deep down matters more than the initial outward appearance…and that the deep down important stuff is what matters to you. Now you know. This will give you a wonderful contrast…the shadow to show you what you want to bring to light.

You know, now, what you DON’T want to repeat…the next step is to define in your mind, very clearly, what you DO want in a relationship…what you do want in your relationships an in your life. The feeling I got reading the first part of your story is that your connection with this man grew out of expectations…your hope for a relationship and what other people define as a good prospect…stable, professional etc etc. That doesn’t, as we see here, necessarily bring the intangible, subtle good things, like respect, caring, compassion, empathy….all those things that are REALLY important.

When I was younger, I saw a psychic, also wondering if I would ever be with anyone. She gave me an exercise…I may have mentioned this last time…that proved to be pure gold. Even if you’ve done this before…try again, start the exercise over, using your new insights and perspectives gained from the trip to vegas…

Make a list of all the things you want in a partner. What kind of relationship do you want? Marriage? Companionship? List every detail, literally, on paper. LIst physical things, interests, personality traits…anything, everything. Don’t put negatives…don’t say “not a gambler” put “enjoys ___________” That part is very important…the energy of the “not” might actually draw the undesirable trait to you rather than block it. Always list ONLY the things you WANT in a positive way.

Then release the list. Put it away, or, if you are inclined to such things, burn it in a respectful ritual of some sort. Whenever you feel the impulse, send a thought to the universe. Pray it…however it feels most powerful to you….not the whole list, just the feeling of desire for “the best of the list” or “husband for the highest and best”…something like that. Send the cry from your heart to the heart of outer space…then let go and trust the universe to guide you to the right path.

There are no time limits. There may be more things to learn along the way…but if you ask for the path to the best, you will find that highest and best journey, no matter how long it takes to get to the destination.

Ask Zombie Cat: Love Life

Q: Love Life

A: Yes? No? Maybe? Either? Both? I don’t know?

The funny thing about free Tarot questions. One of the best ways to get a good answer is to follow instructions and ask, well, an actual question. But as I read the sentence fragment, this came to mind, so let’s approach this as partly a topic (love life) and partly an open reading. Which gives us:

The Chariot (Attention)

Attention is sexy. We all love getting it. To spice up an existing relationship, or to attract a significant other, give a little attention too.

When life is busy, it is really easy to get stuck in our heads, thinking and paying attention to all the stuff we have to do. That goes double for lonely times. Being wrapped up in loneliness and being consumed with wanting a relationship is no way to find one, fix one, or keep one going. If you are not in a love relationship yet, practice on friends. That will give you social support and get your energy rolling in a positive direction until “the one” comes along. If you are in a relationship, take a minute and give the love of your life a precious gift…you, and your undivided attention.

Pay attention to them, care about them, their words, their feelings as if no one else on Earth even exists. When you get out of your own head, out of your worry, and pay attention to others, soon you might be paying that attention to someone special who pays it right back to you.

FAQ: A question of your own

Have a quesion? Ask HERE to have your question added to the new FAQ page

So far, I’ve kept these classics….

Q: Will my ex- and I get back together?

A: That depends on what you and your ex decide to do. Tarot can’t read your ex’s mind or how they feel about you, or predict what they will do. The only way to know for sure is to talk to them directly. If you aren’t talking to each other, then there is little or no chance you will get back together. If the two of you haven’t fixed whatever caused the breakup then no, getting back together is very unlikely. That is just common sense. You don’t need a Tarot reading for that. BUT if you want advice about how to heal from the breakup or how to have better relationships in the future, then Tarot can definitely help.

Q: Nothing you said came true. Why not?

A: I. Don’t. Make. Predictions.

I’ve said it a thousand times. Tarot doesn’t predict the future. That is the dark ages, flat earth way of using Tarot. It doesn’t matter if predictions are “true” or not. I could sit here and make perfect, on-target, 100% accurate predictions all day long, but then you could go out five minutes later and do something that changes everything. (See: Predicting the Future and a Big Cube of Jell-O) Remember Yoda from Star Wars? The future really is fluid and always changing. Life is cause and effect. If you drop an apple, it will fall down. If you strike a match, it will catch on fire. If you pour water on something it will get wet. Cause and effect is the way Nature works. It is science. Your future is created by what you choose and do. Tarot is a way to look at options, then choose the flow of energy that is more likely to take you where you want to go in the long run…not tell you every ripple of everything that will happen along the way.

Q: How can you do readings by e-mail? Don’t you have to be with the person for the reading to work?

A: I read universal energy, not the person themselves, so no, they don’t have to be with me for the reading to happen as it should. Energy and spirit is everywhere, all of the time. I read that universal energy and listen to spirit on that person’s behalf. It doesn’t matter if someone is across the table or across the world when I connect to that universal energy. It doesn’t matter if I say the words of a reading or type them. It doesn’t matter if you hear the words now or read them later. The same core message still gets through either way. I connect to your specific energy message when we talk about your question vs an open reading. That conversation & connection happens the same way when I read your words as it does when I hear them. The difference between a distance and an in-person is the way you experience getting the message, not in the message itself.

Q: How long have you been doing this?

A: It blows my mind to say it, but a little over 25 years. I started reading oracle cards around 1992 as I began my new spiritual life as an ex-christian (after an evangelical upbringing.) At the same time, I started Taijiquan training which introduced me to Taoist philosophy and meditation. In 1996, I began Reiki training, certifying as a Reiki Master-practitioner in 2000. In the early 2000s I started working part time as an online Tarot reader while I worked toward a Ph.D. in Natural Health and started a family. That was followed by working for myself locally under my old website Modern Oracle Tarot. In October 2018 I introduced meditation and Reiki to the Tarot website to become the new TaoCraft Tarot. I’ve been at this for a while, and now teach other people to read cards in local workshops.

Q: Do you read for the LGBTQIA community?

A: Of course! Anytime! Consider me an ally. Readings are naturally gender/orientation neutral. I intuitively “see” people as energy signatures, kind of like a silhouette made of light. Intuition doesn’t tell me anything about gender, orientation, identity, race, hair color, height, or any other specific attribute. I don’t mean to use wrong pronouns in your reading. They are all just completely interchangeable on an energetic level. If I get that sort of thing wrong, just clue me in and we’ll move on. It’s all good.

Q: Are there different kinds of Reiki sessions for different needs, like one for night to relax if you have trouble sleeping or one for morning if you need more energy?

A: Surprisingly no. It isn’t guided or prescriptive like that. The energy is like a raw material that the body uses where ever and however it is most needed. On of my teachers told the story of a gentleman with tennis elbow. He was very skeptical of Reiki, didn’t think it would help at all, but came to the session to placate his wife. He would’t let the Reiki master touch him anywhere except his left elbow. After a couple of sessions it didn’t do anything for his elbow….but it greatly improved his blood pressure. Nothing else in his life had changed to explain the improvement…no change in his medication or diet or activity or anything else that they could think of except the Reiki sessions. The body puts the energy where it needs it the most. Timing isn’t an issue, either. Reiki can be sent with the intent that it activate at a time when it is most needed as well. Like gravity, Ki is everywhere, all the time, and Reiki simply helps you draw from that energy in a time and a place and a way that is for your best health. For example, if problems sleeping is the main concern, a morning Reiki session might help the underlying reason for the insomnia, and in turn help the sleeping problem when bedtime comes around. Like the tennis elbow, the blood pressure was a more important issue. We trust the body (in its physical, mental and emotional aspects) to put the energy where it is most needed. Like the morning session that helps bedtime insomnia, the body guides when the effects of the energy are felt. Thanks for the question!

Tarot Without a Net: The Lovers

PicsArt_03-08-11.01.16.jpg

*Spoiler Alert*

The boat sinks.

I’ve never seen “Titanic” and precisely zero interest in ever watching it. I don’t care for romance movies, and from everything I’ve heard the movie has a disturbing lack of comedy and/or spaceships.

I have no idea why the artist picked this image to represent heart’s desire, or even lusty romance. I’m not feeling a lot of connection with the deck through this card, probably from my impression of the movie it represents way more than the card or the artwork itself.

The Lover’s is an interesting and often misunderstood card, thanks to the movie mythos that the lovers card means a hot romance is on the way with the marriage of a lifetime soon to follow. In my experience, the card is far more abstract than that. It is more akin to “I love ice cream” than the handfasting, marriage, committed, soulmate, love of a lifetime energy that we see in the Two of Cups. The Lovers symbolizes the hot flame that burns short rather than the enduring ember that burns long. Don’t get me wrong, there is some connection, because many if not all long lasting relationships start with SOME sort of spark. Maybe that is why the artist chose this love story from a movie. Maybe the movie portrays a hot romance that gets cut short by a quick dunk in the north Atlantic. Still, it niggles at me that it is wrapped up in a romantic relationship. The Lovers card can be more than that….which is saying something considering how enormous romance is within the human heart. And that’s with leaving the hormones out of it. Like everything there is a two sided yin and yang of it. (See “Arcana in Balance: The Lovers from the Tarotbytes archives).

It isn’t to say that lust, sex, love, desire and full throttle joy of living is bad. Quite the opposite. On one hand, all of those things are part of normal human existence and is as worthy of acceptance as any other emotion. That physicality and abject hedonism is certainly one part of it, but it also transcends the physical. On the other hand, the desire Lover’s card can extend far beyond the realm of romantic relationship. It touches our careers….do we earn our living doing something we are passionate about? In that way The Lovers card asks us to consider our purpose in life, our raison d’etre, our calling if you will. Emotionally it touches on satisfaction, contentment, and emotional needs being met. Intellectually, it touches curiosity, enthusiasm, and voracious learning. Arguably, passion resides in the mind as much as the heart or the hormones. You can be a passionate bowler, or stamp collector as well as being capable of passionate romance. You can be passionate about anything. Love is a big concept that encompasses all sorts of things.

So lets pick up the book and see what the artist has to say:

Whew! Even though we differ in movie taste, the basic interpretation is similar. He also talks about emotions, the joy of living and loving what you do. The connection to the card is similar (it is a fun to get that kind of validation every now and again, even if you have been reading Tarot a long time) even if my connection to the movie represented is obviously quite different. That is the danger of using pop culture references in Tarot. Not everyone has seen every reference or interprets the reference material the same way, even if the intuitive engagement with the Tarot card itself is identical.

When a pop culture reference comes up in a reading (regardless of the deck I’m using) but the client either doesn’t know the reference or responds to it differently than the message and card intend…the thing to do is drop the reference like a hot potato. When that happens you either have to find a different cultural reference that does communicate the intended message OR leave references aside and use your good old fashioned vocabulary. Adjectives are our friends. References like these can be wonderful communication tools, but they aren’t worth holding onto so tight that the reading suffers.

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