Tag: love

My Tarot Valentine: Each Breath

Take a breath.

No, really, take a deep breath. You stopped for a moment to read this (thank you for that) so use it to stare at the screen, look busy but take a deep relaxing breath.

Thanks. I did that too.

The Judgement card is my nemesis. It seems like everyone has a card that resonates with them, that seems to signify where they are in life. Some cards are just comfortable, familiar or welcome. Sometimes a card resonates with an idea or an old battle or some constant struggle…a nemesis.

I won’t introduce you to that particular skeleton in the closet. We’ll get back to that when I get around to writing “Arcana in Balance.”

Still, it is a challenge to connect this card to Valentine’s Day without being overly harsh. So I’ll connect it to a thread of yesterday’s card instead.

Yesterday, the six of cups reminded us of innocence, and the in-the-moment sweetness of simplicity. To taste that sweetness we adults must first release judgements, expectations and pre-conceived notions of what a moment should be. Valentine’s Day this year isn’t business as usual. Let it be the moment it is. Let go of judgement to find your way to the sweetest present moment that you can.

My Tarot Valentine: Sweet

As Sigmund Freud purportedly said, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. The adage that “it is what it is” isn’t as bad as it has been used in recent politics. It speaks to a rugged acceptance of the situation at hand in the present moment.

That sort of accepting mindfulness is the essence of childhood innocence. The energy around today’s card brings to mind the simplicity of a child’s lollipop, pink and red heart shapes, and the small paper valentines school children make and exchange. Even we gnarly old folks can get a sip of that sweetness when we let go of worries and expectations and sink into the present moment with that same acceptance.

That kind of sweet innocence and acceptance is the six of cups message for Valentine’s Day. It’s been a devil of a year. As sexy as self confidence may be, whatever your opinion of all the cards and flowers and high expectations, this Valentine’s Day isn’t the usual. The advice is to let go of this year’s expectations. It is what it is, however lonely, however different, however simplified. Let it be a sweet and simple day. Let it be as open and empty and innocent of a moment as you can.

We can get back to the worry and mayhem soon enough. Let the moment be as it is, and let your heart love however it can.

My Tarot Valentine: Compassion in Power

The Queen of Swords rests in power, but in an alive sort of way.

Today’s card keeps with the self-confidence theme that keeps popping up this Valentine’s season.

  • The Devil: the confidence to be counter-culture and ignore Valentine’s Day outright if you want to.
  • 3 of Wands: the confidence to set aside self and pay deep attention
  • 4 of Swords: self-care allows you the ability (and/or confidence)to care for others.
  • Knight of Wands: um, did I mention self-confidence is sexy?
  • 2 of Pentacles: confidence to balance of self and others
  • 5 of cups: the confidence and courage to face difficult emotions with direct communication
  • King of Cups: the confidence to get advice from trusted sources

Today’s Queen of Swords is similar self-confidence but more. This card has an energy of deep and abiding self-acceptance, not mere confidence. It is the difference between knowing something and iternalizing, itegrating and BEing something. There is great peace that comes with that. That peace spills over into all sorts of relationship. The more you accept and the more you authentically live your highest truth and truest self, the less other peoples judgement matters. The more happy you are with yourself, the less you depend on others for happiness to exist. The more comfortable you are in your own skin, the more accepting you are of others in theirs. The more you are compassionate toward yourself, the more you can be compassionate to others.

The knight cards, and the other cards so far may be self confidence in action, but today, the Queen of Swords is self confidence at peace.

My Tarot Valentine 2021: Two Hearts Can Be Better Than One

No video today…having some issues with the YouTube upload. If I can get it to work, I’ll add the video later below. Before we move on to the card, what do you think of the video / written post combination? Comments are open now, so don’t hesitate to speak up (unless you are speaking in spam.) What do you like about the blog? Hate about it? Let me know what kind of Tarot content you want to read, and I’ll do what I can to create it.

I like the authenticity the videos lend to a post. You can see the card drawing itself. You can see that this is a real, random card draw for the post. It gives a visual, relatable window into the Tarot process over and above a static card image. Because of the large file size, it isn’t practical to do this with full, customized distance readings, but for these general audience, short, one card meditations, the blog and YouTube videos (usually) play well together. By that same token, the written blog gives us the space and pace to explore the card with more depth and thoughtfulness than video will tolerate. I can take a few seconds to stop and listen to spirit and intuition while I’m writing. Those few seconds of dead air in a video are a long boring eternity. I like to think that this combination is the best of both mediums.

Other days, like today, are in full “dammit Jim, Imma writer not a yootoober” mode. If I have to re-shoot a video, then the random part of the draw gets lost unless I draw a whole new card, which is easy enough to do. Other times, like today, the first card has something to say. The King of Cups wants to be heard, so I’ll listen despite the technical glitches both in filming and uploading. And no, it isn’t friggen’ Mercury.

Actually, it is a short, simple, straightforward message.

Talk it out.

Relationships are important things. They are hardwired to connect outwardly, and by their very definition and nature connect to other people. Relationships are not something that can be sorted out if they are a swirling jumble inside just your own head. If, for whatever reason, you are not able to talk it out with the significant other in question, then a sounding board of some sort is really helpful. Yes, by all means, talk, text, write, send smoke signals, do anything and everything you can to communicate directly with the other person in the relationship. If that isn’t possible, then talk it out with somebody. At the very least, talk it out in a journal. Turn the self-talk outward be it with pen and paper or be it talking with a trusted friend or family or therapist or psychic or what have you. The process of talking it out, the process of verbalizing or writing it all out may be exactly the process you need to make sense of it all. Have a heart to heart chat with your pet. Organizing your thoughts and feelings and channeling them through your language centers might just be the bridge from feeling to knowing that you need. It is the switch that makes the light bulb click on.

This has nothing to do with traditional interpretations for the card. It is pure intuition in the context of this “My Tarot Valentine” series, but the advice here is also to talk about any big changes in a romantic relationship before your make up your mind and begin the conversation with your love interest. It has that ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it feels important for someone out there’ feeling.

It feels like it is important to talk out the relationship, and any changes you have in mind, yes, but before you act, talk to someone trusted who is older than you and of the same gender as the significant other in question. I ‘hear’ “slow your roll.” Clairaudience is like clairvoyance, except for me when I say ‘hear’ it means that the intuition is in the form of words instead of mental images. I can teach you more about that another time (watch this space!)

But to stay on message…relationships connect outward, so if you have any concerns about a relationship, process it outwardly. Don’t keep going in emotionally charged circles inside your own head. Write it out in a journal if nothing else. Change to a relationship in terms of this card today holds no judgement. It can be good or bad, depending on your individual situation and needs. Whether you are thinking of popping the question or cutting the cord, talk it out with someone you trust, someone who wants the best for you who is a friend or relative (someone who is NOT invested in the outcome except for your happiness) Talk it out with someone older or wiser, preferably someone of the same gender as your significant other. I don’t know why that part, I’m just trusting the intuition there.

And there, as I always say at the end of a reading, the energy steps back.

Technical gremlins are afoot.

So are some changes for spring. I’m not going to give a “hard opening” for a new distance reading that I hope to develop. I’m hoping to announce a big change for the spring equinox. Please go to the right side of the page (or scroll WAYYYY down if you are on mobile) and follow the blog so all new posts, video or otherwise, will come right to you inbox along with the big announcement. Well, not that big. Think cool, new and improved. Nifty and fun even. Stay tuned!

My Tarot Valentine: I got you

I liked Empire.

Especially the music from the first season. As many TV dramas do, it went off the rails toward the end. Sharks must be jumped it seems.

All in all, my favorite moment in the whole thing was when Cookie told a young Jamal “I got you.”

That hit me right in the motherhood. Maybe it is how I was raised, maybe it us cultural, maybe its just how I’m wired, but to me that’s how a core family (that may or may not be genetically related) show love is by doing for each other. You need HOW many cookies for school tomortow? I got you. You need a ride to WHERE? I got you. You need me to listen? I got you. Need a beer after a long week at work? I got you. Need me to send you a funny political cartoon to make you laugh? I got you. Need a simple answer to a simple question? I got you there too, but it might come on the form of a coffee fueled lecture. Accepting and loving the beauty of imperfection is another card and another day.

Today, the earthy practicality that goes with the Pentacles has my attention more than the idea of balance that the two specifically emphasizes.

Nothing says “I love you” quite like the stuff you do right after the “I got you.”

My Tarot Valentine 2021: The Whole Enchilada

Enchiladas are tasty.

I wonder how everyone out there in the world is feeling about Valentine’s day. The pandemic is obviously throwing a big monkey wrench in the ‘hallmark holiday’ go out and eat, cards and flowers aspect of the thing. I’m personally more interested on trolling for on-sale leftover chocolate at the mega-mart the on the 15th.

In the huge big picture of things, Valentines Day has become a big commercialized nothing-burger. If you really love someone, any day is a good day to show a token of your affection. I’d say surprising them with it on any other day except Valentines Day would be more fun. Although I’m down with dinners out and heart shaped boxes of chocolates. It’s cool. In these times where indoor gatherings with ANYONE you don’t already live with is an open invitation to mutant viruses that could kill you (or someone you care about) Valentines Day takes on a new importance in that it is a good excuse to communicate with anyone and everyone you know. So fire up those sappy cards and emails – heck, send ’em a .gif. It’s whole usefulness in modern culture has been a reminder to express affection for those for whom we feel affection anyway. And cheap chocolate.

In the whole big picture of things, Valentines Day gives a nod to something big and important in our human existence: love, romance and heart to heart connections of every kind.

The chocolate is a bonus.

My Tarot Valentine 2021: Do Your Way

It’s the church lady (think Dana Carvey on Saturday Night Live) version of the infinite monkey theory.

My mom is exceedingly fond of stuff with sayings on them. Mugs, shower curtains, calendars, address books – you name it. It was like growing up in a very church-y Hallmark store. Like the infinite monkeys typing that finally came up with a copy of Hamlet, the mass of platitudes came up with one that actually made sense, in a mind-body connection sort of way.

“Don’t think yourself into a new way of doing, do yourself into a new way of thinking.” – some unknown sappy platitude writer

The Knight of Wands is about adventure, travel, experimentation, newness. It feels like the card is directed to people on the hunt for a soulmate. It isn’t a traditional meaning for the Knight of Wands, but intuitively the Knight is whacking us over the head with the apparent theme for this year’s “Tarot Valentine” series: Self confidence is sexy.

Knight cards are active. They are about doing. Wands cards are about inner fire, our inner, spiritual, philosophical world. Today’s card reminds me very much of “do yourself into a new way of thinking.” It’s a little like “fake it until you make it” but without the fake part. Sincerely do things differently and your thinking will change. You’ll KNOW how good or bad the change is for you. Once the experience of DOing a thing shows you the actuality, then you can embrace or reject the thing not from thinking but from the knowing that only experience can give. “Experience teaches all things” is attributed to Julius Caesar, not the shower curtain.

So what does that have to do with Valentines Day and such?

Here is my thought: Self-confidence is sexy. The pandemic may make this impossible for a while, but when things get back to normal, DO things that take your mind off of being lonely. NO, not going to bars on a heat seeking find-my-soulmate mission. DO something that you enjoy, nay, something you LOVE doing that is not romance or relationship related. DO what you love doing. Put your heart and mind into that, which is in essence a big investment in yourself and your self-actualization, and your autonomy and your maturity and your personal development and – did I mention that self-confidence is attractive?

I mean, look at it this way…who would you rather spend your time with? Would you rather be with someone whose mind an heart is wrapped up in how lonely they are or someone who is already happy and living their best life? If a person is already giving love and attention to what they are doing, that demonstrates they are capable of giving love and attention to you. Who wouldn’t want to be a part of already-existing joi de vie. If someone is all wrapped up in finding a soulmate in order to make them happy, all that shows is that they want YOU to make THEM happy. Not many people are going to sign up for that.

Finding a new love, a soulmate, that certain special someone is a sort of inner alchemy. Living happy draws love to you. Giving your love and attention to the life you already have (or to making it a good life without a soulmate) might be just the thing to DO your way to an attractive, self-confident way of thinking.

Today’s Tarot: Love Upside Down

Everybody loves the love card.

The Lovers card from the major arcana has a reputation for being the big romance card, the one that means THE one is on the way. Not so much. Sure, the Lovers has a big, passionate, lustful, torrid romance energy around it but it doesn’t necessarily connect to a meaningful or lasting relationship. The lovers represents any strong desire, any lust we may have in life.

If you are hoping for a long lasting, satisfying, really meaningful relationship, then the two of Cups is the card you want to see. As I read the cards, Cups reflect our closest relationships. It might mean marriage, but it could also be children, parents, closest friends or any of your most inner circle.

If you are hellbent and fixated on finding that special someone, then reversed two of cups is the worst possible news. That aspect of life is hitting some bumps in the road. It doesn’t mean you’ll never get married, it means that other important relationships that aren’t marriage related are suffering or that the energy flow to do with marriage is slowed, blocked, or otherwise problematic (probably because of the hellbent and fixated part.)

Any relationship, even the ones in your life that are already loving and committed can hit rough patches. Anyone can get on anyone else’s nerves. It’s only human. If you are in a relationship and you see this, don’t panic. Give the love of your life a little extra TLC. Or a lot.

If you are in a relationship that is in real trouble and you see this card, don’t panic. Look inside. Is this really news, or is it confirmation of what you already know but don’t want to admit? You may be asked to give love to yourself, to healing, instead of to another person for a time.

If you aren’t in a marriage-like relationship but really want to be and you see is card, don’t panic. Just put your energy, love and attention into something else. Don’t chase, attract. Magnetize. Live. Be. Let’s just say it. Content and self confident is sexy.

Attract love to you by turning your cup upside down. Call love to you by giving love to people and things that are already in your life right now. A cup has to turn to pour. Love is the one thing you get more of by giving it to other people.

The Niggles: Time Lords 2020

Emperor Tarot, magic spells and Time Lords

public domain card image via sacred-text.com

The idea of time niggles at me when it gets close to a new year. It’s no secret that I’m a big fan of Doctor Who. Consider this if you will: Time is arbitrary and a portion of time is as much under our control as it is for the fictional Gallifreyans.

Actually, not time itself, but rather the way we name and talk about time is arbitrary. This present moment is the one time under our control.

Right now for me it is a Friday night in November 2020. Cool. Gregorian is good. According to the Julian calendar, it’s something like two weeks ago. 2020 a crazy year? No problem – just call it 5780 as it is on the Hebrew calendar. Let’s hear it for 2563 B.E.!

“Time has no meanings except the ones we give.”

I honestly don’t remember if that is something I read, saw on a poster somewhere, or if is from one of the poems I chucked out in the final edit of Triquitera – but it captures the niggly idea about the arbitrary side of time. Take Thanksgiving, for example. It’s less the day than it is the things we DO. No doubt holidays are deeply tied to the time of year in their aesthetic and energy. I suspect it comes from a time when we celebrated the natural seasons rather than cultural or religious things. Thanksgiving is, essentially, a harvest festival. Regardless of season, couldn’t any gathering with family to enjoy a special meal be Thanksgiving? If you can’t celebrate on the exact day you usually celebrate, would it be any less meaningful if you did the exact same things with the exact same people a week later? Or months later?

Have you caught where this is going yet? Yes, I’m looking at you bare faced germ bags that value your individual fleeting entertainment over human life. Cultural events and social stuff change all the time. It won’t kill you to stay home, wear a mask and celebrate differently this year – but catching a potentially lethal contagious illness just might. Or kill someone you love. Or kill someone that someone else loves. If you put your “freedom to celebrate the holidays” over life and love, then you are a slave to present moment, not a master of it.

With the slightest effort we can all be Time Lords.

We are the ones to place meaning on time…we are powerful enough to observe and celebrate whatever thing at whatever time we choose, either individually or collectively. Thanksgiving or Christmas or what-have-you can happen any day or time that we say it happens. That’s exactly how it all started. Thanksgiving happens on the fourth Thursday in November in the U.S because the 1941 congress said so. Or it is celebrated the second Monday in October because Canada said so. Christmas is the 25th of December NOT because of anyone’s actual birthday, but because Emperor Constantine ordered it – probably as a tactic in archaic culture wars.

Holidays and traditions derive their meaning from the intense personal emotions and connections we place on them. If we give holidays their power, then we have the power to assign when and how they happen. If by necessity, the time and manner of celebrating a holiday has to change for the sake of human life, so be it. We have the power to change it. We have the raw power to imbue any time, any place and any activity with all the love, all the emotion, and all the meaning of a holiday. We have the power to help each other through the normal, natural feelings and disappointments that come in times of change and uncertainty. And we have the power to change it all right back again when the crisis is over. We can dominate time through compassion and adaptation. We can take time itself in our stride if only we have just the tiniest bit of the compassionate, protective strength that the Emperor card teaches.

Or, if you prefer, the lesson the Grinch teaches. Even if a green furry dude take all the stuff, the holiday still happens. Even if one year out of your life is different, the holiday still happens because your intention makes it so. Holidays happen inside of you, not out in the world in the best of times. If you give the day meaning, if you suffuse any time with emotion, meaning and commemoration, then that holiday – that time – is yours.

Today’s Tarot: What Does It Take?

The Ten of Cups is one of the most idyllic cards in the deck. It is about as rainbows and unicorns as it gets. Good news all around, especially if you feel optimistic and forward looking. This is a card you want to drop into your future. This is where you want to be headed. Especially when it involves the love, romance and relationship suit of cards, right?

It is also where you want to be right now. I can see how this card can be a pin prick to people who have suffered losses. The card can be a hopeful sign of where you are headed, or it can be a painful reminder of what you don’t have. As with everything, perception plays a large role.

What is missing? What would it take to make your present moment into a Ten of Cups moment?

Filling a need and getting something you don’t have in order for life to be happy can be both difficult and risky. What will you do if you get your whatever-it-is, but still aren’t happy?

Here is your real challenge: What would it take to turn your present moment into a Ten of Cups moment without adding anything new?